250+ Hilarious Funny Monday Quotes: Relatable & Witty

Mondays can be tough, but adding a little humor can make them easier. In this post, you'll find funny quotes that can help you laugh your way through the Monday blues.

Whether you need a smile or just a good laugh, these quotes are sure to brighten your day and help you survive the start of the week.

Enjoy!

Funny Monday Morning Quotes

• "Mondays are like math problems. They add up to zero fun."
• "I haven’t had my coffee yet, so technically, it’s still Sunday."
• "Who hit the Monday button on my alarm clock?"
• "Waking up on Monday is the first step to success—or a nap."
• "Monday is just a reminder that the weekend went by too fast."
• "Mondays are like bridges: shaky and nerve-wracking."
• "I would like to introduce you to my bed. I don’t think Monday should separate us."
• "Monday is proof that time flies when you’re having fun—and drags when you’re not."
• "It’s Monday, and I’m already 90% done with the week."
• "Coffee: because Monday happened."
• "Monday morning checklist: Coffee, sarcasm, repeat."

• "Why is Monday so far from Friday and Friday so close to Monday?"
• "Dear Monday, I’m really over you. Sincerely, Everyone."
• "Monday is like a math problem. Add the stress, subtract the sleep, multiply the problems, and divide the happiness."
• "I need a day between Sunday and Monday."
• "Mondays should come with a warning label: Do not operate heavy machinery."
• "Monday, why are you here again? We just did this last week!"
• "Mondays are for fresh starts—except for the energy part."
• "Mondays are for miracles. Miracles like me getting out of bed."
• "Monday is my second least favorite F word—Friday is the first."
• "A little Monday morning coffee and a lot of motivation—wait, I meant procrastination."
• "On Mondays, even my coffee needs coffee."
• "Mondays: Bringing out the "ugh" in everyone since forever."
• "Dear Monday, let’s break up. I’m seeing Tuesday now."
• "Mondays are a reminder that weekends are way too short."
• "I didn't sign up for adulting on Monday mornings."
• "Monday: The day where everything feels impossible."
• "Monday is like a cold shower: shocking and hard to enjoy."
• "Mondays are like a bitter cup of coffee—necessary, but hard to swallow."
• "Mondays are proof that life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you handle it—with coffee."
• "Monday is the reason why I need six cups of coffee."
• "Waking up on Monday is a test of strength—and I think I failed."
• "Mondays are like the dentist—necessary, but never fun."
• "The only thing good about Monday is that it ends."
• "My bed and I are in a serious relationship. Mondays are just jealous."

• "Monday, you should come with a snooze button."
• "Monday, I can’t believe we meet again. Didn’t I tell you to stay away?"
• "Mondays are like a box of chocolates—full of surprises and not all of them are good."
• "Monday is my spirit animal. That’s why I’m so grumpy."
• "Monday morning: the day I spend time complaining about Monday morning."
• "Monday, I’m not saying I hate you, but I hope the day goes by fast."
• "Monday is like a horror movie: You know it’s coming, but you can’t avoid it."
• "Mondays are the start of the workweek, but the end of my weekend spirit."
• "I’m allergic to Mondays. Can I take the day off?"
• "Monday, I was not ready for you, and I don’t think I ever will be."
• "I’m on a Monday detox—detoxing from life."
• "Monday mornings are when I need an IV of coffee."
• "If Monday had a face, I’d punch it."
• "Monday, I didn’t sign up for this."
• "Mondays are the world’s way of saying, “Let’s see how tough you really are”."

Funny Monday Motivation Quotes

• "Monday: The day that sets the tone for the rest of the week, so make it a good one—or just survive it."
• "Mondays are for fresh starts and strong coffee."
• "Monday is a fresh start. It’s never too late to dig in and begin a new journey of success."
• "New Monday, new goals, or just new excuses to drink more coffee."
• "On Monday, I like to pretend that the weekend is just a rumor."
• "Monday is the day to set the tone for the rest of the week—mine is snooze."
• "Make Monday your best friend, not your enemy."
• "Mondays are a fresh start. Embrace it, unless you’re embracing your pillow."
• "Monday is the first chapter in a week-long adventure."
• "Monday is your chance to start fresh or just drink more coffee."
• "Mondays are for making things happen—or pretending to."
• "Start the week with a positive attitude. If that doesn't work, go back to bed."
• "It’s Monday, time to sparkle! Or just hit snooze."
• "Mondays are for go-getters—unless you’re a stay-in-bedder."
• "Monday is a great day to be too tired to care."
• "Embrace Monday with a smile—or a strong coffee."
• "Monday is a chance to start anew—or to start napping."
• "It’s Monday, but don’t worry. Friday is only four days away."
• "Monday is the start of the week. Make it count—or make it coffee."
• "Monday is a blank canvas. Paint it with productivity—or with coffee stains."
• "Let’s make Monday a masterpiece—or at least try to survive it."
• "Monday is the day to show the world what you’re made of—or what coffee is made of."
• "Mondays are for fresh starts and new beginnings. Or just surviving until Tuesday."
• "Monday: The day when goals and dreams are set—or ignored."
• "Monday is for go-getters—and caffeine-addicts."
• "Start your Monday with a smile—or at least with coffee."
• "Mondays are for making things happen—or for pretending to."
• "Monday is the day to set the tone for the week. Mine is coffee."
• "Monday is your chance to show the world what you’ve got—or how tired you are."
• "Mondays are for fresh starts, strong coffee, and good intentions."
• "Monday is a fresh start, a new beginning—or just another excuse to hit snooze."
• "Monday is your chance to start fresh. Or to start the coffee pot."

• "On Monday, be a warrior, not a worrier—or just a coffee drinker."
• "Mondays are for starting over—or for starting the coffee machine."
• "Monday is the day to set the tone for the week—mine is coffee."
• "Monday is your chance to make a fresh start—or just make coffee."
• "Mondays are for new beginnings—or for new excuses to stay in bed."
• "Monday is the first step in the week-long marathon—good luck!"
• "Make Monday your best friend—or at least your coffee cup’s best friend."
• "Monday is the start of something new—or just another day to survive."
• "Mondays are a new beginning—unless you hit snooze."
• "Monday is the day to set the tone for the week—mine is tired."
• "On Monday, be the best version of yourself—or the best napper."
• "Monday is your chance to shine—or to hit snooze."
• "Mondays are for fresh starts—or for fresh coffee."
• "Monday is the day to set the tone for the week. Mine is sleepy."
• "Monday is your chance to make things happen—or to make more coffee."
• "Start your Monday with a smile—or with a strong coffee."
• "Mondays are for new beginnings—or for new excuses to stay in bed."
• "Monday is the first step in the week-long marathon—good luck!"

Funny Monday Work Quotes

• "Monday is a perfect day to correct last week’s mistakes—like showing up for work."
• "Monday is the day I actually start working—on pretending to work."
• "Mondays are a good day to work hard—or to daydream about Friday."
• "Monday is the start of the workweek. Time to pretend I know what I’m doing."
• "Work on Monday feels like running a marathon—with no training."
• "Monday is a fresh start—if only I could remember what I’m supposed to do."
• "Mondays are for meeting deadlines—if only I had any energy left."
• "Monday is the day I start planning my next vacation."
• "Work on Monday is like chewing cardboard—necessary, but not enjoyable."
• "Monday is the day I start working on my next excuse."
• "Monday is the first day of the workweek—time to work on my escape plan."
• "Mondays are a fresh start—if only I knew where to start."
• "Monday is the day I start working hard—on finding ways to avoid work."
• "Monday is the day I start working on my “To-Do” list—next week."
• "Monday is the start of the workweek—time to start counting down to Friday."
• "Work on Monday is like eating vegetables—you know it’s good for you, but you don’t enjoy it."
• "Monday is the day I start working hard—or hardly working."
• "Monday is the first day of the workweek—time to start pretending to be productive."
• "Monday is a fresh start—if only I could remember where I left my motivation."
• "Mondays are for making things happen—if only I knew what was supposed to happen."
• "Work on Monday feels like running uphill—with no end in sight."
• "Monday is the day I start working hard—or start planning my next nap."
• "Work on Monday feels like walking through mud—slow and exhausting."
• "Monday is the day I start working on my goals—or on finding ways to avoid them."
• "Monday is the first day of the workweek—time to start pretending to be productive."
• "Work on Monday feels like a chore—necessary, but not enjoyable."
• "Monday is the day I start working hard—or start planning my next break."
• "Monday is the start of the workweek—time to start counting down to Friday."
• "Work on Monday feels like a drag—slow and tiring."
• "Monday is the first day of the workweek—time to start pretending to be productive."
• "Work on Monday feels like a grind—necessary, but not enjoyable."
• "Monday is the day I start working hard—or start planning my next nap."
• "Work on Monday feels like pulling teeth—slow and painful."

• "Monday is the day I start working on my dreams—or on finding ways to avoid them."
• "Monday is the first day of the workweek—time to start pretending to be busy."
• "Work on Monday feels like a struggle—slow and tiring."
• "Monday is the start of the workweek—time to start pretending to be productive."
• "Work on Monday feels like a burden—necessary, but not enjoyable."
• "Monday is the start of the workweek—time to start counting down to Friday."
• "Work on Monday feels like a hassle—slow and exhausting."
• "Monday is the first day of the workweek—time to start pretending to be busy."
• "Work on Monday feels like a chore—necessary, but not enjoyable."
• "Monday is the day I start working hard—or start planning my next nap."
• "Monday is the start of the workweek—time to start counting down to the weekend."

Funny Monday Blues Quotes

• "Monday blues: The feeling you get when your weekend plans didn’t include Monday."
• "I’ve got a case of the Mondays—can I get a refund?"
• "Monday blues are real, and I think I’m in the deep end."
• "My Monday blues are so bad, they’re almost black."
• "Monday blues are like a bad hair day for your soul."
• "I didn’t wake up with Monday blues—they were waiting for me."
• "Monday blues: The struggle to find the motivation to get out of bed."
• "I’ve got the Monday blues so bad, even my coffee needs a nap."
• "Monday blues: When you realize the weekend was too short."
• "Monday blues: The feeling when your weekend plans didn’t include Monday."
• "My Monday blues are so deep, I might need a lifeguard."
• "Monday blues: The feeling when you wish the weekend would last forever."
• "I’ve got the Monday blues so bad, I’m seeing red."
• "Monday blues: The struggle to find the energy to face the week."
• "My Monday blues are so strong, even my coffee is tired."
• "Monday blues: The feeling when you realize the weekend was too short."
• "I didn’t wake up with Monday blues—they hit me like a ton of bricks."
• "My Monday blues are so bad, even my coffee is depressed."
• "Monday blues: The feeling when you wish the weekend would never end."
• "I’ve got the Monday blues so bad, I’m seeing black and white."
• "Monday blues: The struggle to find the energy to face the day."
• "My Monday blues are so deep, even my bed is tired."
• "I’ve got the Monday blues so bad, I’m seeing gray."
• "My Monday blues are so deep, even my soul is tired."
• "I didn’t wake up with Monday blues—they hit me like a truck."
• "My Monday blues are so bad, even my coffee is crying."
• "My Monday blues are so strong, even my coffee needs a break."
• "My Monday blues are so deep, even my pillow is tired."
• "My Monday blues are so deep, even my coffee is tired."

Funny Monday Survival Quotes

• "Monday survival tip: Coffee, coffee, and more coffee."
• "To survive Monday, take it one coffee at a time."
• "Monday survival tip: Pretend it’s still Sunday."
• "To survive Monday, just remember—Friday is only five days away."
• "Monday survival tip: Keep calm and caffeinate."
• "To survive Monday, take it slow and steady—like a sloth."
• "Monday survival tip: Start the day with coffee and end it with wine."
• "To survive Monday, just remember—it’s one day closer to Friday."
• "Monday survival tip: Smile and nod, even if you’re asleep inside."
• "To survive Monday, take it one hour at a time."
• "Monday survival tip: Treat yourself to something sweet."
• "To survive Monday, just keep moving—even if it’s toward the coffee machine."
• "To survive Monday, keep your eye on the prize—Friday."
• "Monday survival tip: Start the day with a positive thought—or a strong coffee."
• "To survive Monday, just take it one step at a time."
• "Monday survival tip: Treat yourself to a small reward for making it through."
• "To survive Monday, just remember—every hour brings you closer to the weekend."
• "Monday survival tip: Start the day with a good breakfast—and a better coffee."
• "To survive Monday, take it slow and steady—like a turtle."
• "Monday survival tip: Remember, it’s okay to take a break."
• "To survive Monday, just keep moving—even if it’s toward the couch."
• "Monday survival tip: Treat yourself to something nice for making it through."
• "To survive Monday, just remember—every minute brings you closer to Friday."
• "Monday survival tip: Start the day with a smile—and a strong coffee."
• "To survive Monday, take it one step at a time—and one coffee at a time."
• "Monday survival tip: Treat yourself to something special for making it through."
• "To survive Monday, just remember—every second brings you closer to the weekend."
• "Monday survival tip: Start the day with a positive thought—or a strong coffee."
• "To survive Monday, just take it one hour at a time."
• "Monday survival tip: Treat yourself to a little something for making it through."
• "To survive Monday, just remember—every day brings you closer to Friday."
• "Monday survival tip: Start the day with a smile—and a strong coffee."
• "Monday survival tip: Treat yourself to a small reward for making it through."
• "To survive Monday, just remember—every moment brings you closer to the weekend."
• "Monday survival tip: Start the day with a positive thought—or a strong coffee."
• "To survive Monday, just take it one hour at a time."
• "Monday survival tip: Treat yourself to something nice for making it through."
• "To survive Monday, just remember—every second brings you closer to Friday."
• "Monday survival tip: Start the day with a smile—and a strong coffee."
• "Monday survival tip: Treat yourself to a small reward for making it through."
• "To survive Monday, just remember—every moment brings you closer to the weekend."
• "Monday survival tip: Start the day with a positive thought—or a strong coffee."
• "To survive Monday, just take it one hour at a time."

• "Monday survival tip: Breathe in, breathe out, and repeat."
• "Monday survival tip: Treat yourself to something nice for making it through."
• "To survive Monday, just remember—every second brings you closer to Friday."
• "Monday survival tip: Start the day with a smile—and a strong coffee."